Allie's Thoughts

One year later!

2009-02-23T21:54:00.002-05:00

Wow, it's been almost a year since I wrote on my blog. Not quite sure why Ginger still has a link to it on her blog...But after looking at all of the links she has, it looks like nobody writes on their blogs anymore. That's kind of sad because a lot of her friends were funny and I enjoyed reading their stories. I on the other hand am not funny and my posts are always hideously boring. I have tons and tons that I could write about but don't really feel like it at the moment. Right now I'm just kinda happy that I remembered my login and password for blogger. Maybe, just maybe, I'll write again in another year.

nothingnew

2008-03-17T20:37:00.001-04:00

man alive. i literally have nothing to say. i always think of things when i'm driving along or talking with people but never when i actually sit down and write a blog. so you are all getting a bowl full of nothing. i hope everyone enjoyed it!

Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

2008-01-15T17:19:00.000-05:00

Lately I have been having a bout of insomnia and it really stinks. I fall asleep for a few hours and then wake up around 2-3 am and am up until at least 5 and can't catch my breath and get anxiety attacks. People who don't get anxiety don't know what I'm talking about, but it is NOT fun. On Sunday night I felt like I had to consiously take each breath and if I didn't I would fall asleep and not take breaths and die. Everyone knows you subconsiously breath but I was thinking I couldn't do it unless I thought about it. Sometimes I feel like I'm a hypochondriac but then I realize I just have the worst breathing/anxiety problem anyone can imagine. Ugh. Anyway, so while I'm awake at all hours of the night (which does not make work fun the next day, let me tell you!) I have been watching Nick at Nite which has been featuring The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Good show. Excellent show actually. I laugh and smile and that makes me feel better. I'm a new Will Smith fan. I signed up for Netflix today.

This weekend

2008-01-11T16:54:00.000-05:00

My friend Danielle and her fiance Brian are coming up to the cities tonight to get a mini vacation. I'm very excited to have my friends come visit me again. My last visit from anyone was back in August when Katie, Matt and Erik came up and we went to Valleyfair. I don't have many plans planned out for us yet. I know we're going shopping because I have money burning a hole in my pocket. Don't know if we'll go to Mall of America because 1) I don't know how to get there and 2) It's a bit overrated. And I hate shopping really I just need new jeans. My two favorite pairs have holes all over. And the only jeans I like are really expensive. It's hard for me to write on here because I usually just write on my myspace blog. And I'm crazy girl and don't want everyone reading my thoughts :)

It's been awhile!

2008-01-03T17:12:00.000-05:00

Just a guess, but I'm guessing nobody reads this blog anyway. My being MIA for 3 months probably didn't ruin anybodys life. I am bored.

Life is Beautiful

2007-10-05T15:10:00.000-04:00

Just open your eyes
And see that life is beautiful.
Will you swear on your life,
That no one will cry at my funeral?

Anyone ever heard the song Life is Beautiful by Sixx A.M.? I'm in love with it. That was a sample of the lyrics. I heard it at work today and once again cried. I wonder if these are words Wyatt would have told us had he known how soon his death would come?

Angry Chair

2007-09-18T12:49:00.000-04:00

I was just reading Wyatt's old blogs and "Angry Chair" by Alice in Chains was on the radio. I don't know why but it just pissed me off. Sorry about my language, but it really did. I like that song, but listening to it while reading what my family wrote to Wyatt after he died and all the pain they feel was just more than I could handle. I cried. I hate the fact that I did, but I did. It was more out of fury then sadness though. I get mad at Wyatt. I get really, really mad. That's what I feel. Is that horrible? Sometimes I get so mad at him I scream at him. Well, actually I scream at the empty room, but it's directed at him. Whenever I visit the cemetary I feel good at first and then I just get really, really, really, really upset and mad. I visit the cemetary every time I'm in Dells, it does make me feel better, I like to talk to him there. But when I get angry, I feel like crap. I don't want to be mad at him, but how can I help that? You know? Please don't try to give me advice about this, I obviously don't want it, but I just kind of wanted to rave.

Autumn is here

2007-09-11T17:04:00.001-04:00

Well, according to the calendar on my desk it doesn't officially start till September 23 (or is it the 30th? I can't tell, they are both on the same space on the calendar). But it feels like it outside. It got really cold over the weekend. I'm not complaining though, I love fall. Love it, love it, love it! I finally get to wear sweaters without everyone making fun of me! Yes, I have some issues with wearing inappropriate clothes for the weather (think parkas in the middle of July). And just sitting at my desk I can sometimes smell the air outside and it just smells like fall. I always get excited at the beginning of every season. Like probably the first snowfall we get I'm gonna be so pumped, but by the end I'm gonna hate it. Just like when summer just started getting hot at first I loved it and now I'm just annoyed with it. But I never get sick of spring or fall. Probably because neither of them are too extreme. So here is to an exciting fall season! THAT WAS SO DORKY.

I'm tough

2007-08-03T14:56:00.000-04:00

Well, not really. But I did finally get my wisdom teeth pulled yesterday. They were a little bit sore all day, but I woke up this morning feeling like a champ. Seriously, it doesn't even feel like I'm missing two giant teeth. And giant they are. They asked me if I wanted to keep them, and I sure did. So, they're in a safe, tiny manilla envelope. And they're disgusting!! I take them out every couple hours or so to examine them and imagine them being in my head. It grosses me out, but obviously not too much. I'm morbidly fascinated. Or morbidly obese! (get it, chinch?) Also, I finally got my books for my apprenticeship which I will officially start either next week or the week after. That doesn't sound too official, does it? Uh-oh. Well, I know I've paid and I know I have the books, so it can't be too far out. My friend Katie and her boyfriend and his brother are driving from SD tonight and we're going to Valleyfair tomorrow. I am excited!! I went to Valleyfair last summer and was there for I believe 14 hours. I plan on breaking that record tomorrow. Is that possible? Okay, work is really busy, gotta go!

It takes time

2007-07-19T17:48:00.000-04:00

I am living proof of that! I FINALLY figured stuff out in my life. Finally. I got the apprenticeship!! I'll be starting in around a month and my God, do you guys realize what this means?? I'll be working alongside the people that I idolize. I know that sounds pathetic, that I idolize radio DJ's, but I seriously do, and this is my dream and I could not be happier than I am right now. I have to quit my job, but whatever, I wasn't that happy here anyway, it just paid the bills. I can find something else. I found a new apartment that is really nice and sooo cheap. That sounds like an oxymoron, but it really is nice and it is REALLY cheap. I hate the place I live now, but that lease is up in a month anyway, so I'm good to go. Everything seems to be working out, I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I'm just happy! And my wisdom teeth have been bothering the heck out of me (think oozing sores in the back of your mouth 24/7) so I finally made a dentist appointment to get them pulled. It's about time! I'm gonna get a check up and find out I have 20 cavities too. Joy. But once it's all said and done I will feel much better! Anyway, that was a better update than most I post, so there ya go!

Indecisive

2007-06-26T15:36:00.000-04:00

I sit here and B & M about my life and how boring it is, yet I don't do a thing to change it! It's because I really had no clue where to start! School was too expensive, blah, blah. I'm just repeating myself now, but I finally figured it out. Well, I hope so anyway. I'm going to do an apprenticeship through a local radio station. I'm hoping and crossing my fingers it will be 93X because I'm sorry, I can't even pretend to like Top 40 or Country. That would suck! Anyway, once again, nothing new is up..Exactly one month til my 22nd birthday. Which is weird, because if you read back on my blog entries I was talking about my 21st birthday and that doesn't seem that long ago! But a lot has happened!

It's probably an hour after i first started writing this and now I have a toothache because i haven't been to the dentist in about 21 years and I'M CRABBY.

Well....

2007-06-13T17:21:00.000-04:00

I don't have much to say. My life is still same ol', same ol'. I really wish I had something exciting to write, but I don't. The poker run was fun, I didn't go to jail, so that's always good. I'm still working at MinnPar. I still live in my crappy apartment, except now I have 2 roommates to put up with rather than just 1. I am now not so positive about school because it is too expensive, so I'm destined for a life at MinnPar. I hope I just cheered everyone up and made them feel as happy as me!

Memorial Day Weekend

2007-05-25T17:13:00.000-04:00

A 3 day weekend and it's going to feel amazing. I am getting so sick of my job, it literally makes my stomach hurt. I really don't hate it, and I like making money, but I HATE the idea of working 8-5, ya know? I'm not that type of person. Especially at the age of 21 (almost 22). I just know for sure that going to school and working as a DJ is what I was meant for! Sounds cheesy, but it's true. Or at least I hope so...Can't hurt to try anyway.

It's my friend Danielle's daughters birthday today! Beautiful little Paxton is 1! I never could've imagined my friends actually having kids, but now I couldn't imagine not having Paxton in my or Danielle's lives. She's amazing and perfect and I love her! It's gonna be a whole other story when she starts walking and talking...She took like 10 steps the other day I guess! She's gonna grow up so fast and that sounds cliche, but really, she is. Huh...Just another reason why I wish I still lived in SD.

The poker run is in one week and I am excited as ever!! I hope the turn out is good. And I hope we get t-shirts DAD. Alright, everyone have a safe weekend!! Late

Best.Concert.Ever

2007-05-07T16:29:00.000-04:00

And I've seen some pretty kick butt shows! I was probably 3rd row from the stage, standing room, AWESOME. I got drug into the mosh pit a couple of times, fell on my butt a couple times, but always got helped up. It was worth it! By the end of the night my make-up was smeared down my face, my hair was frizzed out worse than I've ever seen it, and the hole in my jeans turned into a giant tear, and let's just say, it wasn't a pretty sight! But I can't say it enough, I had the time of my life! And I got to meet my future husband. What is it with me and radio dj's? I get obsessed with them. I guess it's a good thing I'm gonna be one! Because oh yeah, I applied for school on Friday! I will be starting in July. It's about time I got on with my life. I'm going to Brown College for Radio Broadcasting.

Heaven and Hell

2007-05-04T12:58:00.000-04:00

More music. I'm going to the Heaven and Hell concert on Sunday night. Black Sabbath, Megadeath and Machinehead!!

A little update

2007-05-01T17:45:00.000-04:00

So, I'm coming home on May 11 to get my sweet new ride! My parents bought me a car, and let me tell you, it is swanky! I can't wait! I haven't had a car in about, oh, 2 years. And then on May 12 it's Amanda's 21st birthday. She already has the party bus rented. (The same one used at Wyatt's poker run last summer) We're going to the casino that afternoon for her to go in the money booth, gonna gamble a little (which I have honestly never done in my life), then hit up the big city of Sioux Falls! I am very, very excited. But what I'm most excited for is my 22nd birthday, which falls on July 27. On July 21, it's the Family Values Tour, which you'll remember I drove 8 hours to go to last summer, but this summer it's in Somerset, WI which is wayyy closer. We're gonna camp out there again, and then on July 24, INCUBUS is coming to Minneapolis! Can you believe it?? It's like HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALLISON. I get to see my two favorite bands within 3 days of eachother! This summer is gonna be a blast!

Do you realize - That I am addicted to the Flaming Lips?

2007-04-18T17:48:00.000-04:00

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face
Do You Realize - we're floating in space -
Do You Realize - that happiness makes you cry
Do You Realize - that everyone you know someday will die

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know
You realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realize - Oh - Oh - Oh
Do You Realize - that everyone you know
Someday will die -

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know
You realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realize - that you have the most beautiful face
Do You Realize

I miss my brother

In memory of..

2007-04-05T13:19:00.000-04:00

Both Layne Staley of Alice in Chains and Kurt Cobain of Nirvana died on this day in 2002 and 1994 respectively. They were both amazing musicians and their legacies will live on through their music. Rest in peace!

Amanda's Coming!

2007-03-20T10:06:00.000-04:00

Again!! How do you have such good friends that they come and visit you once a month? I'm lucky and I know it. And this time I actually have money, so I'm going to plan lots of fun things for us to do! Any suggestions?

Something new

2007-03-18T22:27:00.000-04:00

I'm honestly not even a big fan of the color pink, but I thought this looked pretty. And they don't really give you many template choices, so here we go. I needed a change. It's Sunday night and I am just sitting around watching TV. I went to the movie Reno 911! today. By myself. Haha, that is embarrassing and shouldn't be proudly stated like that, but I did it. I actually thoroughly enjoyed myself and didn't feel stupid at all, but it's kind of shameful when you just put it out there on the internet! And I went to church this morning for the first time in God knows how long. It felt GOOD. I was so glad I went, and it's right across the street from me, so I really have no excuse for taking this long to go. I plan on going every week now, if not on Sunday morning, then Wednesday night. It just makes me feel better, and believe it or not, faith in God is a very big part of my life. I don't talk about it much because nobody likes to talk religion, but I'll put it out there now! Alright, enough. I didn't do anything for St. Patty's yesterday. Oooh! But I did go to an open house at Brown College and got to record a demo! They gave us a script and recorded us for a contest. If I win, I get to be a guest DJ on 101.3 KDWB! I have a 1 out of 17 chance, because only 17 people tried out! 3 of them being me, Kyla and her friend Katie! So, hopefully something comes out of that. I am so excited to start on the path of going back to college and finally becoming a DJ!

Incubus

2007-03-16T17:31:00.000-04:00

I know I just posted about them, but honestly, could their new CD get any better?? I am OBSESSED with it. I listen to it on repeat at work every day. Obviously this isn't healthy, but if I have to be unhealthy, I'm glad it has to deal with Incubus!

On a different note, I actually enjoy my walk to work. It got a little colder today, but earlier this week it was beautiful outside! Even at 8 AM. And I've noticed for the past 2 weeks, since the birds came out, every time I walk through this certain intersection, the birds whistle at me! No, just kidding, it's not towards me, but they do that whistle that guys whistle at girls? You know what I'm talking about?? I hear it every morning! And it makes me laugh and feel happy every time! I look for these birds, but I have no clue where they are, or what kind they are. I'm just glad they're there.

More entertainment

2007-03-09T17:50:00.000-05:00

Now I found out Chelsea Handler is coming to Minneapolis too. Will the fun never end? Seriously, I love Chelsea Handler. I had talked about her earlier, in maybe May of last year. I loved her show on the E! Channel, but it unfortunately got canceled after like a month. I just know her show is going to be hilarious, I have to go!!

Music

2007-03-08T13:16:00.000-05:00

I just heard on the radio that Roger Waters is coming to the cities at the end of June. Who's going? THAT'S RIGHT, BABY! Well, unless of course tickets are ridiculously overpriced, which is a possibility. They go on sale on Saturday, so I'm crossing my fingers that they are in my price range!

Wyatt

2007-02-27T12:37:00.000-05:00

I might as well come out of the closet and admit that I dream of Wyatt at least once a week. I never tell anyone about these dreams because they leave me feeling peculiar. Every single one of them has the same concept: I know Wyatt is going to die, but he doesn't. And it's my goal every time to try to stop him from dying. Trying to change the chain of events that will lead up to his death. He never actually dies in my dreams, and every scenario is different, but it's always the same theme. These dreams haunt me for about an hour after I wake up, just thinking about them, and how real Wyatt seemed. He's always happy in my dreams and when I warn him about death, he never seems too worried about it. Like if it's gonna happen, it's gonna happen. Don't try to stop it, Allie. I'm getting really sick and tired of having these dreams/nightmares, but I know there is no way to stop them.

Primus

2007-02-21T13:27:00.000-05:00

I just discovered this band and decided I love them!

Anyway, work is still going very well. I really enjoy my job.

Last weekend wasn't too much fun. We went to an 18+ place on Friday and Saturday that was like 5 blocks from my house. We listened to a live band on Friday and played pool on Saturday. That's about it. She got here late Friday night and left early Sunday morning, so not much to it! And I just plan on a very relaxing weekend at my parents this weekend doing absolutely nothing!

So, since I haven't met too many people in the cities yet, I decided to either get a part time job or volunteer my time. Since I don't really feel like being tied down to another job, volunteering it was! I applied for a group that helps out teens on the street and homeless people, I applied at a senior citizens center, and I applied for an animal rights activist group that deals with the media. They said if you have an interest in the media and such that this would be a good thing for you, and I figured radio broadcasting is the media, right? So, I applied for that too. I'm getting a packet in the mail for the senior citizens center today hopefully, and that's actually the one I'm most interested in. Might not meet many people there, but at least it will give me something to do!

Amanda's Coming!

2007-02-16T12:56:00.000-05:00

Amanda is coming up here for the weekend! She'll be here in 8 hours and counting! I'm so excited I don't know how I'm going to make it through the rest of the work day. We are planning on hitting up the Saliva and Crossfade concert, but we'll see what happens. We'll just roll with it, and have fun doing it! Then next weekend, I'm headed back to Dells. Gotta get my fix of Dell Rapids before Easter. If I'm away too long I get withdrawals.

Stupid St. Valentine

2007-02-14T12:17:00.000-05:00

Not even gonna say Happy Valentine's Day. Even if I had myself a man, I still think this holiday is a stupid waste of money.

But I am gonna say Happy Birthday to Brandon Boyd tomorrow, February 15. And if you haven't bought the new Incubus album, Light Grenades, get your butts out there and buy it!!

Funny

2007-02-13T17:53:00.000-05:00

I thought this was funny anyway. At work an order came in and the address was this:

5 1/2 miles south of Old Creek Road on Elm Lane

And then it was some town in Kansas.

Just like a regular address is 555 1st Ave. Minneapolis, MN this one just had directions. And my boss told me that he once saw an address that was like this: 10 miles north on highway 10 next to the farmhouse. Also an address out of Kansas. I can't believe this! We're talking major boonies here!

Stupid Blogger

2007-02-07T19:43:00.000-05:00

The reason I haven't written in my blog in a month is because blogger made me switch over to google for some reason, and whenever I would click on the link to do it, Kyla's computer would freeze up. Good for nothing. So, right now I am borrowing my roommates computer because I honestly think Kyla's is shot. It NEVER works. And when it does it is really slow. Good news! I got a job! I started yesterday at MinnPar, which if anyone is interested, can look up at www.minnpar.com. MinnPar distributes construction parts to companies. If you want to order them, you call and talk to me and I process the order and send it down to the warehouse. It seems like a good company, and get this! It's only 6 blocks from my house!!! I guess that was the reason God had for making me wait a month to finally get a job. And this isn't just any job, I honestly feel like I could have a career here. The pay is the best I've ever had in my life and there are bonus possibilities, and of course always promotions within the company. It's small, but I really like it so far. All of my co-workers are 35 or older. I'm not even kidding. But maybe that's a good thing, because then there won't be any drama. I am so happy it's unbelievable. I finally have a reason to get up in the morning, and it's the best reason I've had in my whole life! I live in a big city with tons of people, right on a college campus with tons of people my age, and I have a great full time job with benefits within walking distance. What more can I ask for? I am living the high life and I'm going to enjoy it to the max!

You live, you learn

2007-01-11T01:37:00.000-05:00

That is my motto for life right now. I was in some sort of deep depression that I probably made fun of before. But, I got out of it in a few days, and feel better than ever. Well, not perfect, but happy at least. I got a new job tonight, at a restaurant in uptown Minneapolis, and am pretty proud of that. I was hired on the spot and the owner really seemed to like me. It's not very close to where I live, but I can deal with that. I am starting to realize the world doesn't revolve around Allison Ammon and as hard as that may seem, it's true. I am going to stay in the cities, I am going to be happy, and I will make a life for myself. So, sorry if I had anyone worried, but things are progressing quite sweetly!

This is a sick cycle.

2007-01-08T19:23:00.000-05:00

My life cycle has been so disgusting these past couple of years, I don' t even know what to do. It's like beyond my control. I feel helpless. My life is not going the way I want it to go, and yet I have no power to control it. It just keeps spinning out of control, until it's so far gone, it's unsalvagable. All I can do all day is lay in bed, but is sleep going to come? Not so far it hasn't. So, I'm exhausted and feel like I could sleep for days, but the sweet, blissful sleep never comes. Hasn't for about a week now. And my stomach always hurts, I feel like constantly throwing up, I can't eat. I need to see a psychologist and am seriously considering going back to some form of treatment. Not for alcohol, I feel I am perfectly comfortable with that part of my life still, it's more for my emotional well-being. I need something that makes me feel comforted and I am beginning to think a half-way house will help me out there. I am not 100% sure of my plans yet. In fact, I'm not even %50 sure of my plans. I'm not quite sure of anything right now, just the fact that I need professional help. And maybe some meds wouldn't hurt either!

Ginger is sick.

2006-12-26T14:19:00.000-05:00

It's Christmas vacation and the only person I have to hang out with is Ginger. And she has the flu. Kyla went home last night and mom and dad are both working. So all I have to do all day is sit on the internet. And watch t.v. Because all of my friends have jobs and normal lives. So that leaves me bored. I guess I'm just going to start watching the movies we got for christmas and read the books I got. Kyla gave me the movie 8 Mile with Eminem in it. I don't know why, but I actually really like that movie. I like Eminem, his music and everything. Some of it is stupid, but some of it is really good. And I don't even like rap music. At all. In fact, I hate it. But he's good. I had my friend over last night and I hadn't seen him in over a year. He's best friends with my best friends boyfriend, so we knew eachother pretty well from always hanging out together over the past 4 years, but we never like hung out just us two. It was nice and he's really cool. It's gonna suck having to live in a city where I don't know anyone and have no friends and nothing to do, and am gonna be bored all the time. I am going to need to find activities or hobbies or something. My sobriety depends on it. So my new job is at People First Recoveries, which is a small collections business. Funny that I, Allison Ammon, am working collections. I'll probably end up calling myself. Anyway, it's pretty good money, and I get a base pay plus commission, so that's pretty sweet. My new apartment is in Dinkytown, and for those not familiar with what that is, it's a section of Minneapolis, pretty much right on the University of Minnesota campus. Well, that's where my apartment is anyway. So lots of young kids around my age. That'll be good, meet some new people that way I guess. I live in a 3-bedroom apartment with 2 other girls that go to the U. Haven't met them yet, but hopefully it'll be okay. Well, I can hear my poor helpless sister in the back bedroom, I better go check on her. Happy New Year everyone!

I got the job!

2006-12-19T16:06:00.000-05:00

I start on January 2, 2007. What a way to start out the new year, huh? It's collections, whoopeee, but hey man, it's a job. Gonna go look at apartments in that area tonight! It's all coming together!

Update

2006-12-15T11:42:00.000-05:00

Hi. So, here's just a little update on my wonderful life. I am clean and sober! Yay for me! I just got out of treatment, I stayed for 63 days. It sucked and was EXTREMELY religious, but I got through it. Well, most of it. I left a week early. So sue me. I'm staying at Kyla's apartment right now, sleeping on her couch. Sound familiar? Yeah, I did it a year ago with Ginger. I need to take a long hard look at my life and realize I'm throwing it down the tubes. But anyway, it's a process of starting your life over that I am ready to begin. I am looking at apartments with a guy, Erich, this weekend and hope to get into one by the first of the year. We will either live in Bloomington or Uptown Minneapolis probably. I have two job interviews next week. I am very excited for them and hope something comes out of it. They are real jobs too, 9-5ers. But I am going to the Mall of America this weekend to get applications from the restaurants there. Just in case this doesn't work out, I can always waitress. Ok, there's the update!

I'm back

2006-12-11T15:21:00.000-05:00

Hey. I'm out of Minnesota Teen Challenge. Finally. I'm staying at Kyla's right now. I will write more later.

Here we go.

2006-10-02T21:46:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I haven't written forever since I sit on the computer all day, but I have nothing to write about. I'm moving to Minneapolis sometime this week. Should be an adventure, huh? I am excited and dreading it all at the same time. Hopefully I will finally get my life on track out there! Wish me luck.

My piercing!

2006-09-20T13:52:00.000-04:00

Amanda won a gift certificate to a tattoo shop, but she didn't want a tattoo, so she got her eyebrow pierced. We went last night, and I guess if you mention the radio station, which I've mentioned earlier, the KRRO, you get half off all piercings. So, along with her gift certificate and getting half off, I got to get my eyebrow pierced too! I've had it done before and loved it, but it's been out for over 2 years. I think I like it. Hopefully it looks alright!

Also, I'm not so sure how much I like the new template I picked out. The heading is HUGE. I may change it after awhile. It's just that a lot of people had the green background that I used to have, and I was sick of looking at it.

Nothing.

2006-09-19T13:52:00.000-04:00

Okay, so that last post was a little rough. I was just having such a bad day. It hasn't really gotten much better either. I just found out this afternoon that my temp job is ending tomorrow and the only other thing they have for me here is part time. So, I of course am going to do that before I would quit, it's just frustrating. I can't afford my rent, and Amanda is starting a new job next week, so I will have to find another way to get to work. Which is what? Walk? I don't have a car, haven't made enough money to even save for a car, and now she's starting a new job and I am stuck with nothing. I honestly have no way to get to work now, and I am going to have to quit or something. I wish there was something to help me through this, but there isn't. I am just stuck here. In the middle of knowing what's to come. With nothing to do about it. Nothing.

Bad Day.

2006-09-15T16:13:00.000-04:00

I guess maybe there's a reason you shouldn't live, work and hang out with the same person 24/7. Because lurking underneath all the fun is an EVIL BITCH. It all started a couple of weeks ago, she started acting weird towards me. She would barely talk to me at work and was NEVER at the apartment which is weird for her. And then she started snapping at me for stupid things and it kept getting worse, and then today she just totally went off. We were supposed to go up to Brookings together for the weekend to hang out with our friend, and now I don't think I'm wanted to go. She is seriously pissed at me for something and I don't know what it is. It's no good to talk to her, because she's going through a hard time in her life right now, so she would just be crabby no matter what I said. I don't want to even see her, it makes me so mad. Ugh, this is not a good day.

My future husband.

2006-09-14T12:07:00.000-04:00

I am so crazy it's not even funny. I just read about my future husband who is going to divorce his wife for me. I don't care about his baggage. Think Floyd. Floyd Landis. Enough said.

Family Values 2006, baby!

2006-08-28T18:18:00.000-04:00

Oh yeah! That's right! Allison made a road trip to the Family Values Tour this past weekend. It was AMAZING! It was in Alpine Valley in Wisconsin which is about 8 hours from Dell Rapids. It was also a spur of the moment thing. Seriously, got a call from a friend asking to go, and jumped on it! After the call, I was packed and in the car in about 45 minutes. I'm so glad I went, even if it wasn't the best decision for me at the time. Here's the line up of the major bands: Korn, Deftones, Stonesour, Flyleaf, 10 Days. Well, those were the only bands I knew anyway. There were more, but I didn't even get to watch them because....(feel the anticipation)...(wait for it)...I WAS IN LINE TO MEET MEMBERS OF KORN. And I am not kidding. Right when we walked in, a guy approached us to buy the new Korn CD, which might I add was signed by all the members of Korn, original signatures, we got to meet the band. Well, the members we got to meet were Munky and Fieldy and it was SO COOL. I can't even describe it. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Fieldy. He's the bassist and he rocks the stage, he's so cool. Guess how much tickets were to this bad boy? $4.99. That's right. Parking was more than the tickets (Okay, only 1 cent more, but whatever). I love Incubus more than anything, but I've been to their concerts and this one was 100% better. But as I said earlier, it was in a valley, which means they had us standing on a 70 degree angle to watch the show. It was seriously so steep. So, being as I'm so in shape, my calves are killing me. And I was head banging like a sow, so my neck hurts as well. All worth it though, k, don't worry bout that. Anyone who's reading this who has a rock concert coming near them (or even 8 hours away for pete's sake), one word: GO.

The end is in sight...

2006-08-23T17:39:00.000-04:00

I am going to get laid off probably on Friday. It's going to come sooner rather than later. I have been taking a ridiculous amount of time off, and production is SO slow, it's going to come on Friday. For me and Amanda. So rather than wait around for it, we are taking the initiative to find a new job. Just spent about 2 hours applying online, and am going to job fairs as well. I hate this process, but it has to be done to pay rent, huh? I hope to get a new job by next week, I can't afford to be unemployed for too long. Why does this always happen to me? Ugh. Wish me luck as I start this job hunting journey ONCE AGAIN.

Word

2006-08-19T03:09:00.000-04:00

I don't really have much to post about tonight. Actually this morning being as it's 2 AM. I had to take the day off from work today because our boss said we had to take mandatory time off, so I've just been so lazy all day (big suprise) and never got up the energy to do anything. And now that it's the middle of the night I feel like being awake when no one else in their right mind is! Unless of course they're partying. And speaking of that, ripley's believe it or not, I haven't done much of that since turning legal about a month ago. I have honestly been to the bar 4 times. And it wasn't even fun. I spend too much money and don't enjoy myself enough to justify the money spent. You know? So, I guess that's a good thing. But I spose, I'm gonna hit the pillow.

An obsession?

2006-08-14T19:00:00.000-04:00

Possibly. Okay, it is. I have a GIGANTIC crush on the local morning show host of 103.7 the KRRO. Since I've been waking up and going to work like the rest of the world, I've had time to listen to the KRRO morning show, and Cade is one of the DJ's. I initially had no idea what he looked like, but I thought he was funny and sounded cute. So, I checked him out at www.krro.com and immediately fell in lust. So when he did a live broadcast from ThunderRoad, we had to go check him out. Not only did we check him out, we raced him on the go-karts. So, that was all fun and games, we told him that we loved his morning show, got free t-shirts. We kept listening to his show and we call in literally EVERY morning. We went to the comedy club last week, and guess who was there? Cade. (Although he told us that's not his real name, just a nickname/show name) Anyway, we attacked him once again. He was scared I think. Listened to the radio show the next morning and called in for a game they were doing and Amanda and I each got through 3 times in half an hour. That's SIX times in 30 minutes. Me and her. So, I am seriously stalking this man and I don't even mean too. It's not my fault I get through every time I call, right??

Anyway, work is a disaster. I have no job security. To quote my supervisor "Production is slow". In other words, someone's getting canned. And they have no appreciation for the work that Amanda and I put in. We seriously bust our butts and get no thank you's whatsoever. It sucks to be unappreciated and feel like we could lose our jobs at any second, but I guess that's life, huh?

Valleyfair!

2006-08-04T20:25:00.000-04:00

Going to Valleyfair tomorrow for the day. It was a very last minute decision, Amanda is taking her sister for her birthday and asked me if I wanted to go as well so there would be an even number of people. Get this: Amanda's boyfriend's mom gets $12 off tickets! So, how can you pass that up? Going for $20 this time! We are leaving bright and early and plan on staying until closing time. I haven't been there forever, so I am excited.

Today at work I had a little accident. I was pulling some lumber by the bands that hold it together and the band snapped. And I was pulling with all my might, so I landed on my hand with ALL OF MY BODY WEIGHT. It killed. Why couldn't have I landed on my cushioned bottom? Nope, right on the palm of my left hand. Needless to say, I was in pain all day long and decided to go to the hospital after work to check things out. No fractures, just a sprain. I have to wear this god-awful arm band that extends the full length of my arm for a week. And they gave me vicodin - - isn't that like a street drug? I swear it is...Kind of freaked me out. I will not be taking that! I hope it gets better, but it still hurts a lot!

My weekend

2006-07-30T21:11:00.000-04:00

I went up to the Twin Cities this weekend with my parents to give Kyla a new bed and to get her old one, which might I add is really comfortable, thanks Kyla. It was very short but satisfying. We visited old houses that are now tourist attractions. We went to the James J. Hill house and it was 36,000 square feet! No joke, it was unbelievably huge. And then on Saturday night Kyla, her friend Chris and I went out on the town, cuz I'm 21 and all! It was an interesting night, won't get into too much detail :) but lets just say I don't think I'm the big city type of girl! It was a little too much for me to handle. Speaking of being 21, my birthday came and went with no big surprises. I went out to a few bars, didn't get out of control, didn't throw up, went to bed! Nothing spectacular, but not boring either. I just wish my friends were 21! And ending on a totally different and not very necessary note, I stopped into a rest area with Amanda today to use the bathroom and a morbidly obese lady came puffing in as loud as she could. Like seriously it sounded like she was having an asthma attack. She proceeded into a stall and took the loudest bowel movement imaginable. I was so grossly fascinated by this whale that I made Amanda wait outside until she came back out. 10 minutes later she comes huffing out with her tongue hanging out of her mouth and her situating her elastic band shorts. With a Missdacue. Disgusting.

Happy Early Birthday To Me!!

2006-07-25T23:06:00.000-04:00

Oh yeah, scary as it sounds, I am going to be the big 2-1 in about a day! July 27 is my 21st birthday and I can't wait for it! It kind of sucks though because none of my friends are 21 yet, so I don't even think I'm going to the bars...Just like going around to restaurants and stuff that everyone else can get into. Oh well, maybe that way I won't be so naughty! I promise I'll be safe, okay mom? Anyway, I'll write more this weekend and tell you how everything went.

Been awhile, huh?

2006-07-15T03:17:00.000-04:00

I haven't had internet access for a long time, but in my new apartment there is a guy who has wireless or something, so we are getting free internet for the time being. It's not the fastest, but it works! I just found out tonight, so I will probably be online a lot now. Update on my life, I am still working at Sioux Vocational as a lumberjack, I am still living in Dell Rapids, but not with my parents anymore! I live with my friend Amanda, and we are loving every minute of it. Just trying to save up money to get a car and go back to school at some point. On a totally different note, I ran into my good friend, Danielle, today at the gas station. She moved away right after she graduated three years ago and have only talked to her once since. She is now engaged and has a seven week old baby girl, Paxton Elizabeth. Adorable baby, seriously. And Seth, her fiance, is so nice. We went out for chinese and had a really nice chat. She was honestly one of my best friends in high school, but life took us on different paths. I have her number now though, so hopefully we will keep in touch this time! My life has changed very drastically in the past month and I could not love it more. I thought depression was just a way of life, but now I know differently. Time to live the life that I know I've always deserved!

Lumberjack

2006-06-06T20:42:00.000-04:00

Well, probably everybody I saw at the poker run knows that I am a lumberjack for a living, but for those of you who don't, I am. I saw wood and stuff all day. But I actually don't mind it if I can keep busy and plus I work with my friend, so that makes it A TON better. Let's see how long I can keep that job. It better be all summer, cuz I need the money. I am officially staying at my parents house again, and it works out really well because I car pool with Amanda and she lives in Dell Rapids too. And I'm through with CJ! Forever and ever and ever. Ok, but I won't talk about that too much. Anyway, that's all that's new. The poker run was amazing (except the end) and I can't wait until we do it all again next year!

2006-05-20T16:47:00.000-04:00

I'm over at my friend Amanda's house right now. She has an AB Lounge. Ever heard of it? It's pretty cool, I've seen the informercials, and I got to try it today. It is actually very easy to use. You could easily use it while watching TV. It's graduation here today in Dell Rapids and I'm off to one of my friends' parties. Should be alright, but then I'm definitely headed home to go to bed! I woke up at 7 this morning after going to bed at like 2, and I'm so tired! Has anyone seen the Chelsea Handler show? If you haven't, you have to. It's on the E! channel and she is the funniest person on television. Check it out.

Whoofta!

2006-05-18T21:54:00.000-04:00

I like how I started a blog and then never wrote in it again! Well, here I am again! The reason why I stopped writing is because my job ended :( . It was only a temp job and it ended way sooner than I thought it would. So, I'm doing the old job search thing again, here on the computer trying to make up a resume. I heard that like 50% of people lie on their resumes. I think it might be true! It's an absolutely beautiful night here. I sat outside for awhile and enjoyed myself. But I don't have much time on the computer here, but I will try to write more often.

My new blog

2006-05-08T13:42:00.000-04:00

I feel bad because I deleted my old blog. I know nobody was reading it, and it was really depressing and I should not have written most of the things that I wrote on there, BUT, Wyatt made it for me. He didn't like the old one I had and forced me to start using the one at blogger that he made for me. He made the title "Because Allie Said So" and he put the links on there for me and everything. And now I've gone and deleted it. Well, I feel bad about that, and I like to write, so I've started a new one. I promise it won't be like the other one, it will just be thoughts, nothing about my life, okay? So feel free to read it!